Chuck Norris Is Pig Latin

Normally the hardest part of these clips is getting the actions to line up with what the characters are saying. But this one had a unique challenge. Getting the computerized voice to read and pronounce pig latin in a somewhat reasonable fashion. It didn't really work out, but maybe it's better that way.

How Huckleberry Finn Can Fix Global Warming

Here's the link to the article talking about the idea from Obama's Energy Secretary, Steven Chu.

Splendid Awkward Pauses and Electric Dog Collars

The Most Interesting Deadlines in the World...

Babies, Fire Bathing, and Smores

True story. Here's the guy.

And here's the link to the story. Crazy.

Better than a 401k...

I actually got the idea for this post from a buddy of mine that had a domain name. Someone approached him about buying it, and after some negotiations he got a good chunk of cash from him. He later finds out, that the person he was negotiating with was a representative from BMW. He probably could have gotten a "ton of money".

Crooked Bumperstickers........Why?

The McDonald's Caprice Classic

Here are the pics. It seriously was the weirdest car I have seen in quite a while.

Mister Sinner

Here is the actual news story for the real Mister Sinner...
http://news.aol.com/article/inmate-name-change-sinner/454028

My New Blog Format

Not Fair and Balanced

This is why I don't like Fox News:

http://tiny.cc/VTTwE

They report this story from the angle that Obama's administration requested all religious symbols be covered up for Obama's speech at Georgetown University.

But in reality, Obama didn't request for any religious symbols to be covered. The White House simply requested that everything that wasn't part of the traditional presidential backdrop (blue curtains and flags) be covered up. That happened to include some religious symbols (it is a Catholic school after all).

Ridiculous.

FoxNews did report the story accurately in the actual article, but the headline is misleading and FoxNews and their editors know that most people won't take the time to read the article to find the truth.

Not Really A Sitting Duck...

If you follow current events at all you have probably seen a story here or there about Somali pirates hijacking large freight liners and holding them for ransom. I've ignored these stories for the most part, but now there is one off the coast of Somalia that had an all-American crew.

What I don't understand is how this boat with 7, maybe 8 "pirates"

can hijack this boat that weighs 17,000 tons.

Why would the freight liner even stop to see what they wanted? Maybe I am simplifying this, but wouldn't a small crew of armed security personnel on the boat be able to ward off some rag tag Somali pirates? Just put a few holes in their motorized canoe and watch them sink. The End. No more pirates.

Good Debt - Bad Timing

President Obama's new multi-trillion dollar budget is pretty tough to swallow given the current out flow of resources to the AIG's of the world. But, the budget is overall a good budget and allocates the nation's resources to areas of need.

Check out this blog post:
http://blog.sojo.net/2009/03/26/counting-the-cost-of-good-and-bad-debt/

My Childhood, 2 hours at a time

Here is the list of the top 10 movies that I remember watching as a child. Ya know, the movies that if they came on TV, you would watch it, no matter where it was in the movie. You watched, and memorized.

No particular order of course. I am equal opportunity.

• Flight of the Navigator
• Sandlot
• Top Gun
• Forrest Gump
• Hoosiers
• Field of Dreams
• Indiana Jones - The Last Crusade
• Karate Kid
• Hunt for the Red October
• War Games

.

.

.

.

.

How about a nice game of global thermonuclear war?

Inconsistent Ethics are not Ethical at all

One thing that really bothers me is when people are inconsistent in their positions on issues.

Example: Being anti-abortion and being pro-war. Life is life.

A new one that is gaining popularity:

Being anti-stem cell research and being pro-questionable interrogation techniques.

If you are against harming a human life to help advance scientific research and possibly save lives, then you have to be against harming a human life to help advance defense intelligence and possibly save lives.

Simple. Consistent.

&, Oh &, Wherefore art thou &?

I work at a desk all day long and every day I have a need to use the ampersand key on my keyboard. (ya know, this thing ---> & <---)

The problem is that I can never find the key on my keyboard. I mean, eventually I find it, but it takes a second.

If I need to enter an "s" I know exactly where it is, sandwiched in between the "a" and "d". Likewise, the the "F5" key is fittingly placed right between the "F4" and "F6" keys.

So, who decided to put the "&" where it is?

First of all, it's not even a real key, it's a secondary key. Whoever thought up the modern keyboard apparently didn't think the "&" was a strong enough character to stand alone. It needs the help of the CTRL key and the "7" in order to make it to print. Whatever.

Secondly, why is it in in the same range of fellow secondary characters as the "^" and "*". Who uses the "^"? What does that even mean? And the asterisk? An asterisk is only used* when you couldn't fit everything you wanted to say about something in the original sentence!

*In musical notation, the * indicates when the sustain pedal on a piano should be lifted.

In conclusion, I move to have the "^" replaced with "&" so that both the "6" and "7" keys have the ampersand as the secondary character. Also, the key up in the top left that has "`" and "~" should be done away with and hold only the "&".

That is all.

Bravo?

A standing ovation is a form of applause where members of a seated audience stand up while applauding. This is done on special occasions by an audience to show their approval and is done after extraordinary performances of particularly high acclaim.



It is my stance that the standing ovation has become widely overused and as a result has become grossly undervalued.

Proper Use of a Standing Ovation:
Roman citizens began the practice of the standing ovation as a sign of respect and honor for returning victorious military units. This can (and should) be continued for our troops currently, regardless of political beliefs or any interpretation of "victory".

• As a sign of respect for certain political offices, a standing ovation is a necessary tradition that should be continued. This is why at the beginning of the State of the Union address, the President is never introduced by name, simply by the office.


• When a performer has achieved a level of success that is so far beyond the normal or expected standards, then a standing ovation is a suitable response for the audience. This can be for stage performances, athletic achievements, etc. There really needs to be some self-control on the audiences part in regards to this third standard. I'll touch on this later, but generally if you were able to think about something other than the performance at hand while sitting in the audience, than a standing ovation is not warranted.

Abuses of the Standing Ovation:

Back to the state of the union address. This singular event has more problems with the standing ovation than anything else I can think of. First of all, there is no need to stand up every time the President says something you agree with. Secondly, the standing ovation, or lack thereof, should not be used as a political statement. We know the republicans want smaller government, you don't need to stand up when the President mentions it. We know the democrats want anything and everything that Bush 43 didn't, so there's no need to split the room down the middle during standing ovations. Just don't applaud at all until the end of the speech.

I know there are lots of proud parents out there that are just tickled that little Johnnie can play his trumpet as good as Louis Armstrong. But, he really isn't that good. It's great that the 6th grade band/choir/orchestra/piano recital/play/etc. is putting on a show, but it most likely is not good enough to deserve a standing ovation. Remember, this is something that should be reserved for soldiers returning from war, not a 3rd grader playing "When Johnny Comes Marching Home" on his plastic recorder.



What Caused This Abuse of the Standing Ovation?



I don't think that everyone thinks every performance they go to us standing ovation worthy. But, when a critical mass of an audience stands up (probably 20-25%) and it forces the hand of the rest of the audience to join them. A reasonable audience member that knows the standing ovation is not worthy, doesn't want to make a scene by being the one person not standing up after the mediocre 10th grade version of "Hello Dolly".


Also, now that the standing ovation has become so widely abused, if an audience doesn't give a standing ovation, the performers may be offended and as a result have their self-esteem shattered. What a pity.



What's the Big Deal?



It is my belief, that the abuse of the Standing Ovation is a small part of a larger problem with our current society. We are way to happy to praise people for an average performance. This goes beyond the stage and athletic fields. There are major productions for 5th grade graduations now. Seriously?! 5th grade is an accomplishment?



A reduced standard for excellence can, will, and has resulted in lower standards across the board and a reduced quality because of it. It may be a stretch but I think you can blame standing ovations for this:

Blogging While Intoxicated

Well, I'm not really intoxicated, I'm at work...

But the title makes sense for this post anyways.

Why is marijuana illegal but alcohol is legal?

I can't really get my head wrapped around it myself, so I am looking for some help.

To be fair, here are links to 2 groups on opposite sides of the legalizing marijuana debate:

National Organization for the Reform of Marijuana Laws

Truth - The Anti-Drug

So, what do you think? Should we allow marijuana use given that it is regulated and restricted to adults, no driving, etc.? Should we try out prohibition again and make alcohol illegal?

Lint Rollers and What Not

I'm not Catholic, so I don't make the Fat Tuesday-Lent-Easter Oreo each Spring. But, I do like the concept of it. So, I am going to try my best to give up TV until Easter.

Well, not totally, that's insane. I am going to watch TV if there is a program on that I know I want to watch, or I have something recorded on the DVR, etc.

But, I am not going to play the channel surfing game. There are plenty of things I could probably be doing that are more productive than flipping between ESPNEWS, American Chopper and CNN.

I'm not sure how successful I will be at this, but it's worth a shot, I guess.

Obama's First Mistake

I hate to say this, but the man I voted for president has made his first mistake as Commander-in-Chief of the United States of America.



It is being reported that the Obama's have decided on what type of dog they will get now that they are in the White House.



And the man that makes the most important decisions in the entire world, has shown that he can buckle under pressure.



The Obama's are getting a Portugese Water Dog.


I have a few issues with this selection:

• It is an ugly dog. Plain and simple, that dog is ugly.

• The dog's breed has another country in it. That may not be a big deal but, it kind of is.

• The dog ranks 62nd in popularity in the US. That's just behind Whippets and just ahead of Shiba Inus...................Exactly. (How can the US population relate to a man that has a dog that is less popular than the Soft Coated Wheaten Terrier???

• My main problem with the dog though, is that it doesn't look more like this:

Online Lie Detector

The St. Petersburg Times (among many other online sites) is taking it upon themselves to personally keep track of every one of President Obama's campaign promises.

That's 510 promises made over the course of Obama's campaign.

So far, Barack is doing fairly well with 15 promises fulfilled, 4 compromises, 20 in the works, and only 2 broken promises.

I like the idea of keeping track of campaign promises and making it easy to access and understand for the general public. I don't remember if something like this was inplace for Clinton or Bush 43, but I hope this type of checks and balances continues throughout Obama's tenure as Prez. *It probably wasn't as popular back in '92 and 2000 simply due to the fact that the internet wasn't the incredible tool it is now.

Regardless of where you stand on Barack's promises, I think it is in the best interest of the political process for the promises he made to be kept. If the majority voted for him based on these campaign speeches, than the promises contained in the speeches should be the framework that he builds his administration on.

Stimulating

Does this make more sense than the stimulus plan just passed by Obama and Congress?

Take the 787 billion dollars and divide it evenly between everyone that is 18 years of age or older.

Roughly 260 million Americans are over 17.

$787,000,000,000/260,000,000=$3026 each.

Give each adult in the country 3 grand and I think that will get some money moving around quicker than building roads and preserving national parks. The investments in America's future that are in this bill are good things, but that isn't what this bill should be used for. That's what the government's annual budget is to be used for.

Maybe Obama should just cancel all taxes for one year. Sales tax, corporate tax, income tac. Everything. That'll stimulate the economy for sure.

One Heck of a Job

Since we are one week away from PE Obama taking office, I thought it was a good time to show these pics. These are before and after shots of some US presidents.

(That's Woodrow Wilson in the first shot, FYI.)

I wonder what Barack will look like it in 4-8 years?

maybe?